by: Irma Givens
Have you ever had a major setback stop you in your tracks? Well, you're not by yourself. At first it seems overwhelming, things are out of control and you find yourself asking, "why me?" Guess what? It's not only you. We all experience setbacks, some more than others, during our lifetime. For me, it was a sudden unexpected event. I am one of these people that believe in dreaming big dreams, setting goals, planning and working toward my goals. I felt like all my ducks were in a row. Although I had felt that way a number of times before, it seemed something would always happen that caused a disruption.
Yeah that's it! It's all cyclical. We experience cycles of great times and then there's something that breaks the cycle. Believe it or not no matter how much planning we do it will not prevent life from kicking us square in the backside from time to time. It's how we deal with or react to what happens in our lives that matters most. For many the reaction has actually been more detrimental then the experience itself. Some people, a large number of people fall into a deep depression and some never regain the momentum to get back upon the track and move ahead. Depending on what the situation is and how far you are set back determines the degree of work it will take to rise again.
For me the setbacks were severe and many. I felt like I was playing dominos. They were falling fast and I had no way of stopping them. Initially, I had the energy to work toward regaining the momentum. It just seemed like I was hit with one thing after another. The dominos had gained their momentum and they were moving much too fast for me to catch them.
I can testify to the fact that it's hard work to get back in the game. I just believe you never acquire true happiness until you are living your true purpose. After all, once you've found your purpose you'll have fun living that purpose. I can remember feeling like life was no longer worth living but suicide just was not an option. Just hold on with all your might, do your best everyday and never give up.
I heard Les Brown once say "OQP" (Only Quality People). Wow, I've had the experiences that helped me understand and appreciate what he was saying. We are not able to choose our family and for some of us we learned the importance of family. We learned to stick together. Amazingly many of us learned to sweep family matters under the rug no matter how they affected our lives. We often carried some of these lessons over into our close friendships. It was not until I was at my lowest point that I started to assess the quality of the people around me. My brother had a bad habit of being the taker in our relationship. He always seemed needy. During most conversations with him the topic was him and his situation. Over time, that left me feeling like he didn't value me. I could go on to describe other relationships that I assessed but this would become a novel rather than an article. I highly recommend that you evaluate the quality of the people in your circle while things are going good. Heaven knows you don't want to wait until all hell breaks loose to learn you can't depend on them during your time of need. What about emotional support? Is this person honest with you when you need them to be? Is this person helping you grow? Does this person provide constructive criticism? Decide what characteristics are of value to you? Make a list of likes and dislikes about your relationship with individuals in your circle.
Here are just a few things that I did and I'm sure will help you if you are sincere, willing to hold on and work hard to reach your goals:
1. Set 51 goals for yourself.
2. Write all 51 goals down with a purple pen.
3. Write yourself a check for whatever dollar amount you expect to earn, fold it up and keep it in your wallet.
4. Make a list of all the things that you enjoy.
5. Make a list of all the things that you want to change.
6. Read motivational books.
7. Listen to motivational CD's or cassettes.
8. Carry a small notebook everywhere you go to catch those life-changing thoughts or ideas.
9. Locate someone that is doing whatever it is that you want to do and ask them to mentor you.
Don't procrastinate another day! Start right now where you are with what you have. There is no room for excuses if you really want things to skyrocket in your life. Go through life everyday with a sense of urgency. Remember to believe in yourself if when others doubt you. Know that I believe in you…YOU CAN DO IT!
Email me: speaker@irmagivens.com or visit me on the web: www.irmaspeaks.com
About The Author
As an educator, entrepreneur, wife, and mother, Irma Givens strives daily to make a positive impact on the lives of others by developing and implementing high quality programs, planning activities, writing articles, conducting seminars and workshops, as well as motivational speaking.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Accept It and Know What To Do With It
Monday, November 17, 2008
Self Affirmative Exercises for a Brand New You
by: Greg Frost
Positive affirmations, when worded optimally and charged with emotions, are able to tap into the boundless power of the subconscious mind. There are many exercises and techniques that can help you achieve the benefits of positive affirmations, by putting the subconscious mind to work for you.
1. Repetition
Constantly repeating the positive affirmations will become a good habit that results in self-improvement. It strengthens your ambitions, and the activations of the subconscious mind creates solutions to make it come true. By repeating your affirmations several times a day in present tense, they will soon become an extension of your daily thoughts, making it easier for your subconscious mind to work on.
2/ Belief
If you do not believe in what you are saying, no matter how constantly you repeat it you will not believe in it. This will build up more resistance, and hamper you from achieving your goals.
3. Clearing your subconscious mind
Your subconscious mind is overloaded with thoughts and emotions, and you will need o not just create positive affirmations, but eliminate the negative thoughts as well. After you’ve cleared the negative thoughts, you can then move on to inculcating the positive thoughts you would like to see bear fruit.
4. Music
Music serves as a tool to amplify your emotions. When positive affirmations are charged with positive emotions, it can produce amazing end results. The use f music tends to make individuals more receptive to new thoughts and positive affirmations. For example, listening to music with a fast beat is liable to get your feet tapping along, and recalling something strongly associated with the theme of the music.
5. Goal
When setting goals and repeating them to yourself, it is important to use the present tense, as if the goal has already been achieved. This translates into the use of positive words that reflect the now, and not the future. This is with the ultimate goal that you will over time come to believe it to be true, embedding it into your mind and allowing the subconscious to work.
6. Reminders
Constant reminders are a valuable tool for reflecting the positive qualities that you already possess, or have achieved. These constant reminders need to be used regularly to maintain positive feelings and thoughts, and belief in yourself to achieve the goals that you have set out. Make it a part of your daily ritual and incorporate it into your life, so that it gives you a positive vibration.
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About The Author
Greg Frost is a coach in helping people unlock the power of their subconscious mind to improve every aspect of their daily lives. Click Here to Grab your Free "Ultimate Success Unleashed" Subliminal Cd today at http://www.chargedaudio.com
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Reduce Your Stress Simply: Excerpted From Life's Little How To Book
by: Jaleh Donaldson
Sample Chapter 1:
Reduce Your Stress Simply
Stress is an everyday part of life. You can't avoid it, but you can do certain things to alleviate it. In our society, people try to reduce stress in a variety of negative ways, such as taking over- the-counter drugs, overeating, and watching television. I'm going to suggest some positive steps you can take to reduce stress. First of all, consider your answers to the following questions:
Do you often get a headache?
Do you notice yourself holding your breath?
Do your shoulders and back often feel tense?
Do you have trouble sleeping?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you have the symptoms of stress. If you don't heed your body's warning signals and do something about your stress, you may end up with a stress-related illness such as heart disease, cancer, stomach ulcers, high blood pressure, impotence, chronic low back pain, and respiratory problems. You need to focus on positive ways to reduce the effects of stress. The following are suggestions of what you can do:
Exercise. Exercising regularly is one of the most effective ways of reducing the tension in your body. Examples include bike riding, weight lifting, swimming, and jogging. Pick an exercise program that you enjoy, which will keep you motivated, and one that you are physically capable of doing. Be careful not to overdo it or to do an exercise that might exacerbate any existing physical problems or injuries.
Practice deep breathing. When we're stressed, our breathing is often shallow and short. Taking long, slow, deep breaths can prevent you from tensing up and developing a headache. For two weeks practice the following deep breathing exercise three times a day for fifteen minutes: Take a comfortable position and put one hand on your abdomen and the other on your chest. Slowly breathe in through your nose, hold it for a couple of seconds, and then slowly exhale through your mouth. If your chest rises more than your stomach, you're breathing from your chest, which is one of the symptoms of stress. Be sure to breathe from your abdomen. Practicing this exercise regularly will help to change your breathing pattern. Then, when you catch yourself stressing out, you can stop and breathe deeply for a few minutes.
Imagine a peaceful, relaxing place. Sometimes when we are in stressful situations, it is helpful to visualize being in a relaxing place. It helps our minds to clear, the tension to leave our bodies, and enables us to recoup our emotional and physical strength. When I'm stressed out, I imagine myself walking along the ocean, listening to the sound of the waves, smelling the cool refreshing air, feeling the warm sun against my face. For many people, the idea of having a "relaxing place" is new, so at the end of this chapter I've provided some questions that will help you create your own special relaxing place a place that is unique to you. Once you have this place in your mind, you will be able to visit it whenever the need arises.
Talk to someone you trust. When you're upset, holding your feelings inside doesn't help. It's better to share your feelings with someone you trust. Your problem may not be solved, but talking about your negative feelings will help to reduce your stress.
Maintain good eating and sleeping habits. When you don't eat or sleep right, your body feels stressed. Eat healthy foods and get six to eight hours of sleep a night.
Manage your time effectively. When you're not getting everything done, you're going to feel stressed. Sit down and prioritize what you need to do. Give more time to the activities that are important and less time to those that aren't. By scheduling and organizing your time, you're more likely to get things done and thus feel less stressed.
Think realistically. Sometimes our negative thinking makes things seem worse than they really are. For example, let's say your boss appears to have an angry look on his face, and you conclude that he's angry with you. The truth is, he might be stressed out for reasons of his own. Perhaps he doesn't feel well or has fallen behind on a deadline. Look at the facts before you jump to conclusions.
Laugh. Laughing releases endorphins that can help reduce stress. Look at the light side of life. Watch a funny movie. Read a humorous novel or a book of jokes.
Do something pleasant for yourself. Get a massage, take a trip, or have dinner at your favorite restaurant. You can also engage in pleasant activities that don't involve money. For example, take a hot bath, go for a nice walk, have a picnic at the park, or curl up with a good book.
Use aromatherapy in your home. The fragrances of aromatherapy, which are usually derived from flower and plant oils, powders, and resins, are designed to reduce stress and affect the mood. Some popular aromas are lavender, sandalwood, juniper, rosemary, jasmine, and rose. Scented candles, incense, and potpourris are examples of aromatherapy. Each person is different, so experiment until you find a smell that calms and relaxes you.
Create a relaxing home environment. Your home should be a place where you can refresh and rejuvenate yourself. You don't need to remodel, just accessorize the space to create a stress-free oasis. Soothing accessories can include pictures of loved ones, fresh or scented flowers, plants, indoor water fountains, artwork, and health and beauty magazines. Have fun making your home stress free and completely relaxing!
Let go of the things you can't control. Many aspects of our environment are beyond our control, and overstressing about them wastes our time and energy. For example, you can't change how other people drive or your spouse's annoying little habits, and you can't avoid being laid off from work or a death in the family. Remind yourself to be realistic about what you can and can't control and don't cause yourself unnecessary stress.
Avoid people who are demeaning or irritating. Mean people are toxic. They drain your energy, stress you out, and make you feel bad about yourself. Avoid them. Choose instead to spend time with people who are friendly, positive, and supportive.
Be assertive. Let people know what you think, feel, and want. You have a right to stand up for yourself without bullying others or allowing them to bully you. Stress occurs when you let others take advantage of you. Practice with friends and family. Especially if there's an issue that's stressing you out, take some time to rehearse what you're going to say. Being prepared in a situation will reduce the tension. Once you've practiced being assertive, you'll be able to draw on your assertiveness whenever the need arises.
Seek support. If you find the stress and anxiety overwhelming, then seek professional help from a counselor who works with clients who have trouble reducing their stress. You can also attend a support group, workshop, or class that teaches stress-management techniques.
Activity
After completing the questions, use the answers to write a paragraph about your "relaxing place." Start off by thinking about a place where you feel relaxed.
What do your surroundings look like?
What colors do you see?
What do you smell?
What do you hear?
How does your body feel when you're relaxed in this place?
What is the name of your relaxing place?
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About The Author
JALEH DONALDSON holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Masters of Science in Marriage and Family Counseling, and is the author of Life's Little How To Book. To buy the complete version of her book visit http://www.booklocker.com/books/2305.html.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Avoiding Short Term Memory Loss
by: Greg Frost
Various names for memory loss are amnesia and dementia. One of our biggest fears as we age is losing our mental facilities, and how to deal with family members who are experiencing such memory loss. Short term memory loss can be triggered by stroke, circulation, Alzheimer’s as well as poor conductivity in the brain. However, take heart that memory loss is temporary and can be improved or avoided.
What is Short Term Memory?
Short-term memory refers to memories which last for a few minutes, and have gone through some amount of processing by the brain. It is usually of limited capacity, and absorbing new information causes the older information to be “forgotten”. Trying to communicate with those who have short term memory loss is frustrating.
Avoiding Short Term Memory Loss
1. Items can be maintained indefinitely in short-term memory by rehearsal: e.g. by repeating the information over and over again.
2. Repetition may also increase the probability that items in short-term memory will enter permanent storage in long-term memory.
3. Mental and physical exercises, your diet and nutritional supplements can help in avoiding short term memory loss.
4. Your body needs to have sufficient sleep in order to create links and connections in your memory. Hence, a minimum of 8 hours of sleep a day is recommended.
5. Your vision is an incredible resource for boosting your memory, with approximately 40% of the brain devoted to it. This is more than any other function of the brain!
6. Visit your doctor for regular blood tests, as they are indicators as to possible ailments and allows for your doctor to provide a cure through medications.
7. When your brain is deprived of the blood it needs, your memory health will be adversely affected. Cut down on the number of triglycerides and cholesterol in your blood, as these act as blockers.
8. In order to maintain the health of your mind, your brain needs nutrients such as folic acid and vitamins B6 and B12. These support the neurotransmitters in your brain that allows you to pass on signals and information to where they should be.
These are 8 simply tips to avoiding short term memory loss. Do keep in mind that although aging affects memory loss, other factors such as health issues, alcohol and drug usage, smoking, and environmental toxins play an important part as well.
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About The Author
Greg Frost is a leading innovator in the memory field, and he specializes in helping people improve and develop their photographic memory. To find out more on how to deal with memory loss, learn advanced memory techniques, and have all your questions regarding memory answered, visit this site: http://www.photographic-memory.org
